People who live by the teachings of Supreme Buddha get the rare fortune of living happily. How a person perceives and reacts to faults of others contributes significantly to the happiness of that person. ‘Forgiving and forgetting’ the words and actions of others, is a strategy that can be adopted to ensure our happiness when others attempt to hurt us intentionally or otherwise. It is the opposite of the strategy that majority in our society adopt when they get hurt by actions or words of others i.e. revenge and regret.
Words and actions of others belong to the past. Nobody can change the past. Therefore ‘forgiving and forgetting’ will not change the past, but will give the present and future a chance. If one is wise and able, he would definitely try to let go of all bad things belonging to past and concentrate on present and future. Forgiving and forgetting will help you to maintain a contented state of mind. It will also help to minimize the arising of and continuation of disputes. No dispute can arise if the affected party or parties forgive the respondents.
Also, there is no point in worrying about what others do or say, since, more often than not, people act and talk ignorantly without considering the impact on others. Further, we may be getting hurt as a result of our own misdeeds in this life or past lives. In that case, any thought or reaction against the ones who hurt us will accumulate as demerits to be retributed in future. Therefore, when we get hurt, it is advisable to forgive and forget in order to be happy and progress in the noble path.
So next time:
When you get to know that your rights have been violated… forgive and forget
When someone else takes credit for something you did… forgive and forget
When you are blamed for something that you did not do or say…forgive and forget
When people make fun out of you…forgive and forget
When you find out that you have been cheated… forgive and forget
When you find out that your loved ones have betrayed you… forgive and forget
When people forget the good things that you have done for them… forgive and forget
When people hurt you with intent or not… forgive and forget
When hard earned achievements of yours go unnoticed… forgive and forget
When someone misguides you or provides wrong advice… forgive and forget
When people exploit your skills and capabilities to achieve their objectives…forgive and forget
In short, let’s forgive and forget all the bad things that others have done or said whether intentionally or not. BUT, let’s make sure that we appreciate and remember all the good that others have done to us and world-at-large, and their good attributes.
By Mohan Senaratne
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